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en*LIGHT*en//vol.5

June 17, 2016 Rachel Nevergall
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en*light*en. verb. 1. To bring knowledge or understanding. 2. To bring spiritual illumination.

It's been far too long since I shared any en*LIGHT*en-ing links. I know this because my saved tabs runneth over. 

No particular theme to this grouping other than what set my heart afire and what brought my heart to tears, what made me say AHA and what made me say HAHA. So basically pick what emotion you want to feel today and click away.  Oh lookie there, even my non-theme became a theme. 

* Romance and Productivity? This is speaking my love language. After spending a couple hours whirlwind cleaning for our weekend guests, we rewarded ourselves to a glass of wine on the couch and soccer for him/blog reading for her. We really know how to do romance. I said "we should do this every Thursday night so we could go into the weekend with a clean house. He chuckled and nodded putting it into the category of all the other things I say will be our new tradition that happens once. 

* "You have found your X. You are here. Let yourself be here." Whatever your X this gives you permission to love that place. 

* Meanwhile in the X, there is still time to pursue your passion, in the margins of life. Ahhh. So inspiring. 

* Need more inspiration? Be that girl who gives yourself the best pep talks.

* Finally someone wrote a book just for the messy, cluttered, creative type person like me who sometimes actually finds The Joy of Leaving Your Sh*t All Over the Place. Hopefully that book shows up in my library hold cue before the other one.

* My no sunlight bedroom/new office (Squeal! I should share pictures!) needs plants because #coolpeopleownplants, but plants need sun so I've been feeling stuck. I'm thinking these felt succulents would be fun and kitchy and also requiring zero sunlight. And likely bring me Joy (see above.)

I'm realizing that being a Godmother is a lot like being a Grandmother as I sit here excited for my Godson to arrive with his parents, who used to be the ones I got excited for. Hope you have something to look forward to this weekend! Hug the dads in your life, in person or virtually!

 

 

← Making Room for the DinosaurThe Dad Skills We Can All Learn From →
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Hi there! I'm Rachel.

I believe each morning is a fresh start and I believe hot coffee is step one. 

It is here that I celebrate each day as an opportunity to seek the creative inside both our children and ourselves so that we can all       raise and shine. 

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I always think big when looking ahead to a new season. In winter, I think this is the year I organize my photos, repaint all the rooms, write that memoir, train for that marathon. And then I get to the last month, see I have done none of that, and I panic. This is not healthy. But as I sit and think of my summer, I worry that same anxious feeling is approaching. Quick! Only four weeks left to go to all of the parks, swim at all of the beaches, eat all of the ice cream, write all of the essays, read all of the books! I want to do that. But I won’t. However, I could also go the other direction and just say, well there goes another summer come and gone. Too bad it wasn’t what I had hoped. Try again next year. This year, I want a balance. This year I want to end the last month with a little more peace, a whole lot of grace, and perhaps with more intention on what feels good for all of us. But to do this, I recognize I need to let some things go. This year, I recognize for myself one area that sucks me into a black hole when I am feeling drained is social media scrolling. So with support from other fellow writers, I am going to try to press pause. I’m not setting any other big goals. I’m not doing this in attempts to prove how negative the world of Instagram and Facebook can be, because I don’t believe this to be true. I am simply making a choice to go a little quiet in order to spend some time with me. I’m hoping this means more writing, more reading, more play. But if it just means more quiet, that will be enough. // As I go quiet for a bit, I leave one last post on summer cozy on the blog. While I will keep this space quiet for the next month, I may pop in here or there to share what I am writing. Because that is always the best use of this space for me. Until then, here’s to many more cozy summer days. ☀️ They tell you to make time to talk. But communication has never really been a problem for us. We’ve always made time for that. In the few minutes we have before they descend our bed in the morning. Pilot to co-pilot on long car rides when everyone is magically quiet. During kitchen clean up with someone on dish duty and the other on leftover wrap up. In our 17 years and counting we have mastered the art of finding little pockets of time to catch up on our lives. But the fun is what I miss. I miss the joy of a shared bike ride. The early evening paddle boarding. The noshing over incredible food that no one has to clean up or put away. That is what I miss from this guy. And when we get it, if only for a night, I feel like we have stolen back years. I want to bottle up that fun and pop it like a pill. But we can’t. So instead we don’t take the moments for granted. We rush out of the house like we just robbed a bank. We smile all the way through it. And, yeah, we talk about the kids. But at least we’re having fun while we’re doing it. May every summer day be filled with the exhilaration of two cousins on a swing flying to the moon on a rocket ship.🚀 They tell you to get more in the picture. So I lean in. I selfie. I hand the camera over. I try to be accepting of the girl, woman, mom, wife, friend on the other side of the lens instead of trying to find the filter that hides my self-defined imperfections. I don’t always get it right. But I try to get in there. So when you see my squares, you might sometimes see my face. Sometimes you might see theirs. Or maybe not a face at all. But I can assure you, while the picture may not always look like me, the words will. This is what I am practicing. To show you who I am through words. I have made a few new friends in this space, so it seems like as good a time as any to participate in #fridayintroductions. A few things to know about me, as narrowed down by this photo... ☀️Afternoon quiet time is a firm personal value. It is a nonnegotiable. It is like water. It may not always look like this, peaceful with a book in hand. Occasionally there is a computer and words. Or a sponge and a podcast (rarely.) But always it should be quiet. The six year old, four year old, and one year old in my care may not consistently respect this about me. But they will. When they are old. ☀️Speaking of reading, the book in my lap is I’ll Have What She is Having by @erinleighcarlson and the title of the chapter MFEO, Made For Each Other, and if you get that reference you now know my favorite movie of all time. ☀️Speaking of Made for Each Other, the person that usually shares this bed with me (instead of the fellow shadow who snuck in during “alone time” to hide from her brother) is most definitely my MFEO partner for life. He picks up where I leave off. Often this means actually picking up after me, seeing as I’m the “messy one.” ☀️Speaking of Messy, I am. Literally. My clothes are always messy (note the spill on my dress.) And my room (if you panned out you wouldn’t understand how I could relax in this space.) But also emotionally. I have a lot of feelings. And I use a lot of words (and I do mean A LOT) to explore them. But like I said, while I try to get my face in the picture, it’s my words that will tell you who I am. Thanks for reading them. It is nice to meet you. 👋🏻 Yesterday they had their chance to forget the parts worth forgetting and remember the parts worth remembering. Today it’s my turn. Today I remember this moment. How magical it was when they drifted off to imagination island. How each person was content. Together. How little they look in this big room. And how happy it makes me to see them little. So happy that it made me stop and just watch in wonder instead of taking advantage of the stillness to clean my kitchen (who I am kidding. I’ll take any excuse to not clean the kitchen.) And as I remember this I will forget the messy room and the whining that will ensue when invited to clean it up. Well, maybe I won’t forget. But at the very least I’ll give space to both memories. Feeling thankful today that my children will remember this day as the time their mom surprised them with milkshakes for snack and an afternoon movie instead of the number of times I used my outside voice, and not in the cheerful sort of way. Teaching my children the complexities of a mother’s emotions is one of my greatest skills. . . . . #motherhood #letthembelittle #herviewfromhome He finished his first Olympic Triathlon today and killed it. He was nervous and skeptical. I was solidly confident for him. I have seen him balance three kids before. That is its own triathlon. But now he has a medal to prove it. So damn proud, no other way to say it. . . . . #triathlon #minneapolistriathlon #nokomislife “I greet them every morning in their beds as the sun rises. I lean close, checking for needs, examining their growth. Seeing their little individual spirits rising up with the sun puts a smile on my face. It’s the best way to start the day. I’m talking about my vegetable garden. Did you think I meant my children?” // Identifying my children’s growth and progress, and my own for that matter, does not come easy for me. Taking a cue from my garden, as I so often do, and checking on our progress in a season that feels as endless as a Minnesota winter. I am participating in an @exhale.creativity blog hop series today based on the theme “Measuring Up.” For the rest of the essay, along with links to other participants in the series go to the link in my profile. On your sister’s first birthday I printed photos. I made banners. I styled a mantle to celebrate her day. On your brother’s first birthday I made a cake and a birthday crown and blew up balloons. And on your birthday, I handed a poster board to your brother and sister and asked them to color it while I got dinner ready. And yet here you sit with the widest grin on your face like you couldn’t dream of a happier place to be. This is you, Leo D. Surrounded by chaos. Always in the middle of it all. But without a doubt smiling as widely as possible pulling me straight to the heart of what matters. Somehow in the midst of the hardest year of my parenting life, I believe I have smiled more than ever before. The heart swelling, cheek hurting, change your whole mood kind of smiles. You make this life we all live together the happiest brightest colorfulist mess. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜 There are the pictures we take on vacation, the ones that make the memory books and the timelines. And then there are the pictures we never get, the ones where we were without a camera, or the lighting wasn’t quite right, or it just couldn’t be captured inside a digital square. Like her first experience with a firefly. The way she ran around chasing, calling the little bug to come into her reach. The delight and surprise in her eyes, her smile when he made it into her tiny cupped hands. Blinking “hello” from underneath her fingers and thus completing the dreams of a six year old with that simple task. Or his encounter with the Brown Line train, just like the miniature one he pushes along the tracks of his own creation, only this time it is in real size and blazing by him as he stands on the street eye to eye with its wheels. How he shouted to the group of distracted commuters “WOW! Did you SEE that?!?!” Bringing smiles to their faces because sometimes it takes the joy of a four year old to show you what you’re missing. And the sound of his giggles as he sat on the shore, waves coming in rhythm, splashing icy water on his face and surprising him each time. How he bounced his attention from me to the waves and back again to me, inviting me into his contagious glee. Vacation was as vacation does, exhaust and delight each of us. Some moments we got on “film.” For the rest, I hold them in the albums of my heart. Here’s to savoring those memories too. #asummertosavor #ccfreewrite #exhalecreativity
“The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away”
— Pablo Picasso
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