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en*LIGHT*en//vol.5

June 17, 2016 Rachel Nevergall
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en*light*en. verb. 1. To bring knowledge or understanding. 2. To bring spiritual illumination.

It's been far too long since I shared any en*LIGHT*en-ing links. I know this because my saved tabs runneth over. 

No particular theme to this grouping other than what set my heart afire and what brought my heart to tears, what made me say AHA and what made me say HAHA. So basically pick what emotion you want to feel today and click away.  Oh lookie there, even my non-theme became a theme. 

* Romance and Productivity? This is speaking my love language. After spending a couple hours whirlwind cleaning for our weekend guests, we rewarded ourselves to a glass of wine on the couch and soccer for him/blog reading for her. We really know how to do romance. I said "we should do this every Thursday night so we could go into the weekend with a clean house. He chuckled and nodded putting it into the category of all the other things I say will be our new tradition that happens once. 

* "You have found your X. You are here. Let yourself be here." Whatever your X this gives you permission to love that place. 

* Meanwhile in the X, there is still time to pursue your passion, in the margins of life. Ahhh. So inspiring. 

* Need more inspiration? Be that girl who gives yourself the best pep talks.

* Finally someone wrote a book just for the messy, cluttered, creative type person like me who sometimes actually finds The Joy of Leaving Your Sh*t All Over the Place. Hopefully that book shows up in my library hold cue before the other one.

* My no sunlight bedroom/new office (Squeal! I should share pictures!) needs plants because #coolpeopleownplants, but plants need sun so I've been feeling stuck. I'm thinking these felt succulents would be fun and kitchy and also requiring zero sunlight. And likely bring me Joy (see above.)

I'm realizing that being a Godmother is a lot like being a Grandmother as I sit here excited for my Godson to arrive with his parents, who used to be the ones I got excited for. Hope you have something to look forward to this weekend! Hug the dads in your life, in person or virtually!

 

 

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Hi there! I'm Rachel.

I believe each morning is a fresh start and I believe hot coffee is step one. 

It is here that I celebrate each day as an opportunity to seek the creative inside both our children and ourselves so that we can all       raise and shine. 

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About to fill this tiny three bedroom one bath bungalow with 5 boys & 1 girl ages ranging from almost 8 to almost 1, 4 grownups, plus some other visitors throughout the weekend. It’s gonna be loud and chaotic and cozy and beautiful. I could cry with joy. You don’t need a lot of space to host the people you love. You don’t need to make it spotless to make them feel at home. You don’t need much but a really big table, mismatched chairs, pizza delivery, cold beer, and just enough time to connect with people you have not hugged in far too long. This lovely mess is what I live for. 🏡 It’s been a few frames since we had a Leo smile so I thought I’d throw this one in. I promise the other two are still very much present in my day to day. But this guy here is the only one who will stay put when I plop him down. Literally, he doesn’t move. The therapist in me has anxiety/shame about this on the regular. But when I look deep into my heart I feel like I needed this one to take his time. I needed him to be at my side just a little bit longer than most. And I needed to remember to trust that he and I will get to where we need to be when it’s time. And also you know the second I saw these laundry carts we were going to have a Friends moment. 🧺 I give you this horribly grainy and very goofy photo to share a really important person. This is my sister, @emilyestelle3. Emily graduated yesterday with her dental degree. Which seems like it would be a hard thing. But she also completed this while raising two little ones. She went to her dental interviews as a new mom of a three week old, pumping in between intellectual conversations with smart people. She moved her family to start her education, ultimately single parenting for part of the week so her husband could keep his job across state. She studied after putting her babies to bed. She powered through pregnancy and postpartum to show up every day for her education. She did the thing where you balance your personal needs with your children’s needs and she did it like it was no thing. Being the older concerned sister that I am, I thought she was nuts. I really did. I find parenting to be hard enough, but parenting and pursuing an education sounded like a terrible idea. I would not so subtly ask her questions like “so how are you going to do that with a baby?” And she would just shrug her shoulders and tell me “Whatever. We’ll figure it out.” Her tone was defensive but I’m sure there was some anxiety there. But what is stronger than anxiety is grit. What is more powerful than fear is determination. What is just about the best example to set for your children on pursuing a goal is to actually pursue one yourself, all while loving and caring for them along the way. She might tell you I’m her mom mentor. This may be true. I started the journey 2 years before she did so I knew a couple of things. But let me put it on record to say, Em, you are my dream go-getter mentor, if that is a thing. You teach me every day that if you want something for yourself, there is never going to be the perfect time to get it. The stars are not going to magically align for you. It also might sort of suck for parts of it. But whatever, you’ll figure it out. Em, you figured it out. I’m so proud of you. ❤️ Last year he stood with two feet on the ground, eyes gazing up, equal parts envy and wonder, at the bigger kids climbing high into this tree like giant squirrels. I want to do that, he whined. Next year maybe you'll be big enough for that, I told him. Next year to a 3 year old is further than the moon. It’s further than Christmas or their next birthday. It might as well just be a no. And yet here we are, a trip around the sun later and I hear a shout “hey mom” from behind my shoulder as we play at the same familiar playground. Well look who is up in that tree. This is where I should say “Darn these kids they grow up so fast.” But that’s not what I was thinking as I looked up in that tree. I was thinking how little he looked. // I’ve been thinking a lot lately how I push my kids to be big, to grow, to move on to the next thing. Perhaps I need to see them as little instead. // New post on the blog today on letting them be little. Even when they do big things.🌲 My office has moved. Please forward my mail. And maybe bring me an ice tea with lemon, unsweetened thanks. ☀️ “Mum.” I would love it if that little word of his was for me. It’s not. It’s for his other deep love, “food.” Or “eat.” Or “give me whatever it is you are eating right now before I start my pterodactyl scream.” He is at that super fun stage when he is making sense of the random sounds he makes and turning them into words. Making it all the more important for me to watch what words we give to him. I am a writer. I know words matter. But that doesn’t stop me from using words with my kids that would probably be better sent through an editor first. Wouldn’t it be great, though, if only the good words from mom were the ones that stuck? // Today on the blog I’m sharing another round of #RaiseYourMomGame with Words from Mom. Three different phrases I have heard the moms in my life use with their children that I find worth repeating. Oh 💩 not included. Let’s keep the conversation going! What are your best Words from Mom? I dug my toes into the sand and heard the water whisper... ✨”Welcome back.”✨ On Mother’s Day, I long to bring comfort to those grieving for a mom, wishing to be a mom, frustrated and confused by motherhood. I’m a peacemaker, I want to make it right. But I can’t do that for you. What I can do, though, is find the gratitude in my being. I am grateful to be their mother. I am grateful to have a mother to call upon when I need help. I am grateful to be surrounded by partners who support those who mother. I am grateful to walk along side other mothers. I can’t bring healing to those who long to be in my position. But I can promise to be grateful for the privilege I have been given. And I can also promise to offer a less than pretty picture of my pile of kids in bed with messy breakfast faces in case you are disappointed by that posed photo you tried to get without success. “Set wide the window. Let me drink the day.” ☀️ Edith Wharton And drink it we have. Sunshine has been spotty these last few weeks. But when it was here, I believe we made it count. If you hadn’t guessed by my name, sunshine and light are important to me. I gather it in a vessel, one drop at a time, so when the days are less than bright I still have nourishment. Sometimes the collecting of sunshine happens in my heart. But more often then not, I do it through word and image. I went looking for a picture today and discovered so many memories have been captured behind this lens while we were drinking in our days, but I never stopped to share. Likely I was waiting for just the right words to say when sometimes you just need the pictures to tell your stories. Speaking of stories, I’m throwing open my window today and sharing a life-lately update on the Insta stories. May there be many an open window and sunshine ahead in your weekend! Also, PS, note the return of the summer beach blanket. I think perhaps it needs a hashtag if its own. #raiseandshineblanket What is our morning routine, you ask? Well we start out great with a well rounded breakfast and light conversation around the table. Then I realize we’ve wasted too much time and everyone needs to get dressed. Then someone can’t find the other sock to their favorite set. Then someone else comes up in the same outfit they wore to school yesterday and has a meltdown when they are told to change. Then I forget I haven’t made lunches yet and can you make a lunch from the heels of the bread and these over squishy strawberries? Before long the alarm goes off, the one set to gently remind us to put shoes on and walk peacefully out the door. But I’m still in my pajamas, so is the baby, where are my keys, get your shoes on, they are right there where you left them, please don’t stand in the middle of the hallway where I need to get by to go put on some clothes, not those shoes these shoes, no I don’t know where your library book is, seriously, where are my keys, WHY AREN’T YOUR SHOES ON YET, crash-bang, I found my keys but I broke a bowl. So it’s fine. But I think we are ready for a break. Thus begins the countdown to summer. 26 days of school left and it can’t come sooner. I’m trying out a new thing this year and doing an ABC countdown to summer. Read all about it on the blog today. Have you already begun your countdown? ☀️
“The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away”
— Pablo Picasso
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